Mind Games

I recently went on a trip to Selesa Hill for Chinese New Year, celebrating it with my entire immediate maternal side of the family. It's a feat to be achieved, since I've never been able to remember many moments where the entire immediate maternal side (3 aunts, their husbands, and all my cousins) was together for more than 3 hours.

Anyway enough about silly stuff that goes on through my mind. Let's head on to the rare thing about my blog - Pictures.



It's mostly flowers though, since we went through a botanical garden and I suddenly decided to take up my k800i and snap pictures of all the different flowers I could find. A photographer wannabe is me!


Not gonna explain what the flowers are unless they got some stuff I wanna say about. I mean c'mon, they're just flowers afterall, and I don't have their names.


One thing I hate about blogger though. The pictures and the text gets messed up everywhere. So sometimes I never really know where my pictures end up.


Anyway this flower was really hanging downwards. I put my camera facing upwards and snapped. It's nice. Lotsa balls.





So here's another picture of another flower. It's the same as the flower above, but the balls got busted. Just kinda liked the look so I took a pic anyway.










Here's another flo













And here's a different flower, same species, with a different angle. Nice huh?























Next picture was a red thing but imageshack screwed it so it's spoilt. Too lazy to reupload so nvm it.

























This one was really big (bigger than hibiscus) and hard to take (cuz my camera's zoom sucks and it was a bit out of reach).











I like these, they look really sweet.













And this isn't a flower, I just took it to show off my handphone camera's sharpness :P



















































Without and with flash.
















































































This is me, camera was in a small erm.... monument thingy. made for an interesting shot :D











And my grandmother decided to join in.




Look! FATAL FRAME!













And a nice scenic view.

My smallest cousin (sister) and my uncle's friend.
























And here's some french thingy.




Well that's all the pics for the hill holiday. It was kinda fun since I had all my cousins there. Since they're grown up now, it's fun and cool to have them around. In the past it was playing with lil kids and I get annoyed by lil kids easilly >.>





On some other off-hand... I gave Jas a rose on Valentine's Day (and a helping hand... make that 2 hands, for her colour studies assignment). She gave me a peck on the cheek. That was so totally unexpected I was so tempted to zone out for a few minutes, but I caught myself and maintained composure.

And today, I gave her a bag of Patchi Chocolates, burnt her the 3 House episodes I downloaded, and included a nice card with a nice mini-dress in front. Just hope she doesn't try getting into the dress. I also tried leaving it annonymously on the doorstep, but the holes on her grill wasn't big enough to stuff the bag through. Told her brother to tell her some random person dropped it off, but it was kinda obvious it was me because of the House CDs. See you're smart. Or just not that blur. (I even disguised my handwriting)


So... What's the sum of it? Yes I still like her. She does have some really nice qualities (and a body I just adore >.>). But nah, I don't think we're really compatible. At least not at the moment. After all, the only thing I did was sap her purse dry. Now that I've got work and money, I'd just like to repay the kindness she did out of obligation for her bf.




And oh yeah, I'm working now, in a company called Pocket Group. Basically they edit wallpapers, ringtones and videos into formats and sizes that are compatible for Handphones. The clients are mostly UK ones (since the main office is in UK, this is just an Asian branch), so there won't be anything for Malaysia as of yet (besides hardly anyone uses 3G).

But but but, one of the clients who sends videos to be shortened and converted, deals with soft porn. Girls topless or nude, posing for photoshoots (the video of them in the shoot), and post watershed girls (a hose hangs down from the middle of the pub, girls wearing only a thong and a really thin t-shirt goes and bathes sexily in public, then strips their T-shirt off) and a bunchfull of girls just stripping their tops off in pubs and discos while dancing... you know the etc etc around that.

Mom didn't like it (DUH) so I've made a deal with the other editor in UK that we'll switch some clients. She does the vids where the client that wants the porn stuff, and I'll take other clients from her.


Truthfully speaking, I didn't know what to think. My mind was blank, and I was just 'doing my job'. I didn't make a decision as to whether I was for or against it. One part of my mind reminded me of my Christian principles. The other part reminded me of my pre-job times where my mom would constantly nag, the world nags, and I would remain broke and feeling so worthless cuz I didn't have money to buy stuff for people. Heck even Christmas was really sad. I wish I could've bought something better for Jas, but I couldn't due to financial constraints. I was so afraid that everyone would hate me and be against me again if I quit this job because I didn't want to handle the porn.

That's what I felt like you know? Like no one wanted to support me. Choosing between obeying certain obvious principles and gaining acceptance from people around should have a clear and easy decision. Yet I struggled because I feared losing the confidence I had regained just BECAUSE everyone stopped putting a mountain's pressure on me that I'm worthless if I don't work.

It feels horrible.

But who cares anyway. As long as I get a job.




Anyway, stuff's going well. I learn very fast by nature, and all the stuff I'm required to do, I already know most of it, and have the experience in dealing with the problems that can arise. So it's not a problem. My department (if you can even call it a department) head is really really nice to me, and the rest are... Well generally nice. The 2 other guys in the production team (minus the graphics guy, he's a quiet and really nice guy) who does the ringtones and stuff (well actually just one of them) is really bitchy. I'd say he's gay, but James (the friend whose job I'm taking over) says he isn't so whatever. Either ways, he bitches about everything and talks bad about everyone. A regular bitch. But he showed me that he was nice today by sitting with me who was sitting all alone during lunch cuz the other table was filled. He even bitched about the other colleagues about 'how can you leave him all alone there on the table? wad la you ppl'. I wanted to laugh, but at the same time I was surprised, so I shut up :P


Anyways, more stuff later. I'm really tired and sleepy. Haven't had enough sleep ever since I started working, so I'm gonna catch up on it tonight.

Oh on a side note, I've collected over RM800 worth of Angpow money >D About RM830 if I'm not mistaken XD XD XD All thanks to my birthday falling on 2nd day of chinese new year, where everyone came to my house to celebrate cny AND my birthday XD (so double ang pow XD) This is the most I've ever collected so far. Doubt I'll get anything more than this. (I still haven't collected from some people, but that can wait. Don't need to be greedy XP)




God


Maybe this IS Your given job after all.

Just had to deal with that small issue, in which wasn't too much of a problem.





God bless my blogreaders. And Ben, and Jas, and Jun, and Ivan.

Goodnight.