100 Posts of Rants and Whines
Well that's what some people call it anyway. Whining, ranting.
These very same people have no idea what it's like to be emotionally very sensitive.
Of course they don't. They don't think, that's the problem with most of them. They just couldn't be bothered to waste that extra effort in the people who NEED that extra attention to detail.
Bah.
Well, I just came back from a trip to a cave and some up-north regions called Ipoh and Taipeng. Went yesterday, returned today. Was a rather fun trip with my home-fellowship members, 40 people inclusive of myself.
I guess all in all it was rather fun... Not something I'll be talking to my friends over and over again and wishing it wouldn't end kind of thing... That usually happens on for the shows I'm performing in. But nonetheless it was rather fun and interesting, somewhat amusing to a point.
Yet now I'm here, blogging again. This time, it's about my peer pressure.
If I ever said I'm not affected by peer pressure...
I guess I either lied, or was unsure of what I felt before.
Now I understand what I feel.
I DO feel peer pressure.
It's just that... I'm able to completely block its outward effects on me easilly.
The only problem is... It manifests itself deep inside me.
3 friends were talking online about playing Pokemon just a while ago. I got excited cuz I like playing Pokemon too, to a certain extenct. I'm probably one of the few who's able to beat lvl 63-70 pokemon (elite four and rival) with only lvl 55-58 pokemon. I use strategy and tactics (and a whole bunch of cash for revives ONLY) to win, and I've always done so so far, even though sometimes it's really hard.
Then when asking about the version they were playing, they were playing Pearl Version. Not too much of a problem since I have a GameBoy Advance, the usual (and original) platform in which Pokemon games are usually played, save for the Pokemon Colisseum for the GameCube I think.
Then they talked about DS Lite. It's a new gaming platform, similar to a GBA but higher-end. It's the latest thing. My suspicions grew so I personally asked one of them if they were playing on a DSLite.
She said 'yes'.
Just then I realised that I've never had a game I could properly play with and have fun with a whole group of friends I already know, and NOT have them desert me or get envious of me. The only possible close-one is Ragnarok Online, which I started off playing and got to know some people there. Later when I was invited into a well-known guild, they got jealous because they were the ones who played more often. I promptly quit the guild. But they never seemed to get over it. Our conversations became less and less and finally today, it stands with a simple 'hie',
'what?'
'how're you?'
'wrong timing, bz rite now'
'oh sry... won't disturb then'.
They're always busy. Always alwasy busy. Ugh. Either that or it's my horrible timing. But then again, they never bother to say 'hie' or 'how're you?' to me either.
Ever since then, I've tried with other people and other friends, which are RARE ocassions.
None. Nothing.
I feel so... left out by my peers. It's like they don't WANT me with them.
Am I.. really that horrible a person...?
God...
What's the problem with me..?
These very same people have no idea what it's like to be emotionally very sensitive.
Of course they don't. They don't think, that's the problem with most of them. They just couldn't be bothered to waste that extra effort in the people who NEED that extra attention to detail.
Bah.
Well, I just came back from a trip to a cave and some up-north regions called Ipoh and Taipeng. Went yesterday, returned today. Was a rather fun trip with my home-fellowship members, 40 people inclusive of myself.
I guess all in all it was rather fun... Not something I'll be talking to my friends over and over again and wishing it wouldn't end kind of thing... That usually happens on for the shows I'm performing in. But nonetheless it was rather fun and interesting, somewhat amusing to a point.
Yet now I'm here, blogging again. This time, it's about my peer pressure.
If I ever said I'm not affected by peer pressure...
I guess I either lied, or was unsure of what I felt before.
Now I understand what I feel.
I DO feel peer pressure.
It's just that... I'm able to completely block its outward effects on me easilly.
The only problem is... It manifests itself deep inside me.
3 friends were talking online about playing Pokemon just a while ago. I got excited cuz I like playing Pokemon too, to a certain extenct. I'm probably one of the few who's able to beat lvl 63-70 pokemon (elite four and rival) with only lvl 55-58 pokemon. I use strategy and tactics (and a whole bunch of cash for revives ONLY) to win, and I've always done so so far, even though sometimes it's really hard.
Then when asking about the version they were playing, they were playing Pearl Version. Not too much of a problem since I have a GameBoy Advance, the usual (and original) platform in which Pokemon games are usually played, save for the Pokemon Colisseum for the GameCube I think.
Then they talked about DS Lite. It's a new gaming platform, similar to a GBA but higher-end. It's the latest thing. My suspicions grew so I personally asked one of them if they were playing on a DSLite.
She said 'yes'.
Just then I realised that I've never had a game I could properly play with and have fun with a whole group of friends I already know, and NOT have them desert me or get envious of me. The only possible close-one is Ragnarok Online, which I started off playing and got to know some people there. Later when I was invited into a well-known guild, they got jealous because they were the ones who played more often. I promptly quit the guild. But they never seemed to get over it. Our conversations became less and less and finally today, it stands with a simple 'hie',
'what?'
'how're you?'
'wrong timing, bz rite now'
'oh sry... won't disturb then'.
They're always busy. Always alwasy busy. Ugh. Either that or it's my horrible timing. But then again, they never bother to say 'hie' or 'how're you?' to me either.
Ever since then, I've tried with other people and other friends, which are RARE ocassions.
None. Nothing.
I feel so... left out by my peers. It's like they don't WANT me with them.
Am I.. really that horrible a person...?
God...
What's the problem with me..?
posted by Liil Masks at 10:40 am
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