A Blog For A Different Face
I know that I shouldn't be doing this, it's against my own set of uphelded laws that I impose on myself. Yet... My anger... Depression... And... Dislike towards what has been done upon me has grown a little too strong as of late for the part of me that holds it within to contain it any longer... Upon this very blog, I release my despair upon a certain situation...
############: ZOMG~!! @@;; It's time for a new start with lotsa LOVE~!! XDXD S####, i lub yewwww!! *_____*;; GAMING IS FUN NYAA!!! THX 4 bein there 4 mwe~ m(_ _)m
And that would be M's nickname's words in a chat module she most frequently uses. S#### would be the guy that she used to be with before we got up together, the guy that supposedly caused her pain and sorrow, hurt and depression.
What do I think about it? I would say that my first guess was correct - that she HAD been playing me all along.
What can I say? I can't say anything. It's her life not mine. Though I wish I could say that playing me was the worst and stupidest thing she could EVER have done in her entire life, that playing me would bring her great misery... I can't. That's not me, that's not my way of dealing with things. That's what my emotions are TELLING me to do, but it's just something I fear I cannot ever do. Not to say that I fear I cannot, I'm PROUD to say that I won't. To go against my ethics of NOT torturing people's minds to the fullest is something I cannot do at all. No.
All that emotion... Thrown away. All that hard work and devotion... Laid to waste.
Yes, one would definitely have gone up to her, yelled the hells and beyond out of her and returned home, feeling accomplished and more at ease.
Only I don't. Though I anger and despair so, I have to control my emotions and not let them get the better of me, lest my fury be set loose upon all whom I interact with. I know the limits of my own rage and though it DOES have limitations, those limits are not small. Those who have seen me truly anger to a point of no control would know that side of me - the side I wished I had never shown and never do I wish to reveal again. Those who have not... Have a good perception of who I am and I would like to leave it as that. I like those who know me, and I don't want them to keep away from me. They're turning my other half around, and I hope they will succeed in doing what many have failed to do.
I grow weary of this matter. Perhaps if questioned, I may answer your questions.
Good night.
############: ZOMG~!! @@;; It's time for a new start with lotsa LOVE~!! XDXD S####, i lub yewwww!! *_____*;; GAMING IS FUN NYAA!!! THX 4 bein there 4 mwe~ m(_ _)m
And that would be M's nickname's words in a chat module she most frequently uses. S#### would be the guy that she used to be with before we got up together, the guy that supposedly caused her pain and sorrow, hurt and depression.
What do I think about it? I would say that my first guess was correct - that she HAD been playing me all along.
What can I say? I can't say anything. It's her life not mine. Though I wish I could say that playing me was the worst and stupidest thing she could EVER have done in her entire life, that playing me would bring her great misery... I can't. That's not me, that's not my way of dealing with things. That's what my emotions are TELLING me to do, but it's just something I fear I cannot ever do. Not to say that I fear I cannot, I'm PROUD to say that I won't. To go against my ethics of NOT torturing people's minds to the fullest is something I cannot do at all. No.
All that emotion... Thrown away. All that hard work and devotion... Laid to waste.
Yes, one would definitely have gone up to her, yelled the hells and beyond out of her and returned home, feeling accomplished and more at ease.
Only I don't. Though I anger and despair so, I have to control my emotions and not let them get the better of me, lest my fury be set loose upon all whom I interact with. I know the limits of my own rage and though it DOES have limitations, those limits are not small. Those who have seen me truly anger to a point of no control would know that side of me - the side I wished I had never shown and never do I wish to reveal again. Those who have not... Have a good perception of who I am and I would like to leave it as that. I like those who know me, and I don't want them to keep away from me. They're turning my other half around, and I hope they will succeed in doing what many have failed to do.
I grow weary of this matter. Perhaps if questioned, I may answer your questions.
Good night.
posted by Liil Masks at 8:42 am
3 Comments:
Hmmm..sad case. What to do? Just take this as experience and learn from it. Yes, it might be frustrating to know that your loved one betrayed you but this is life. Yes, God is in charge of your life but you have free will. You chose to go out with her and you face the consequences knowing that it is not God's will. Think before you start any other future relationships. Is it God's will or not.
Oh by the way, isn't Happines spelt as "happiness"?? Sorry. Your perfect english had a bit of flaw. Had to correct it a bit.
hey...do ya believe that God is always there for us? do you believe he cares about us and would never let us suffer alone and uncared for? lean on God. you'll find that He's always there for you, no matter that you haven't followed his plans for your life.
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