It May Be

I realise I should've taken up psychology. I'm sure I've had more patients and cases than anyone who's taken psychology and just graduated has had.


This was what was written in a conversation between me and a friend. By written I mean typed of course. At least, this is what is close.

~~

A person with insecurity problems with friends all around who constantly lift one's spirits up and praise them for their strengths, always caring and showing that they love one for a friend definitely will be much better off.

However a person with insecurity problems with friends who don't even call to ask why they're late for a class that has just started, with group members who don't bother to find out why their member is missing will start to think.

'Friendly insults' that are hurled.

'Friendly gestures' that are immoral and non-benefial.

Even if they mean nothing more, it makes one think.

And 80% of the time, one will think negatively of the situation.

And when one does that, depression will start to set its foothold.

~~~


Ok I added some, but it should've been in there anyway :P


But seriously. I've 'counselled' quite a number of people. I've helped them to see the brighter path and guide them to follow it. That is I guess, one of my purposes in life. To bring them to the brighter road. To guide them to the better path.

To see them go where I have not gone.

To watch as they go where I may never go.



It's sad to live a life where your friends in your own class and your own group couldn't care less about you. Even in the youth group where I go, I feel the similiar thing. I am an acquaintance, someone they know exist and breathes.

Not someone anyone would miss if one disappeared, never to return.


Sometimes I wonder, am I really important in this world? Does God really have a place for me in His plan?

I can't count the number of people I've brought to Christ. That's cause the number isn't countable. I have too many fingers on my hands to count.

However, I love helping people up. They've fallen down, I take the pain and effort to ensure they get back up, brush themselves and continue on their way.

It's just that... I feel that...

When I fall down... I have to pick myself up...


I know there are people out there willing to help. I know at least some of my friends really ARE friends.

But I don't know if I can allow them to help.

I'm just... Afraid.


Untrusting.


Insecure.



God...

Thank you for my friends. I treasure them deeply.

And to CSY who's away from the country, I pray that she enjoys her stay in the foreign land of her dreams and returns home unscathed.

Good night...