Who Is To Blame?
I am.
No one else but me.
It hurts when the person whom you believe loves you most in this world (besides God) keeps using your guilt as a weapon against you to do something they want you to do.
And it hurts when it happens often.
Very often.
I feel the guilt enough without anyone telling me.
I know the guilt well enough without anyone pushing it.
But she has to rub it in.
A lot of times.
It hurts.
Whatever happens, whatever will happen and whatever that has happened before;
I'm to blame.
No matter whose fault it really is.
I'm to blame.
The first question that comes to her mind when something wrong happens
is "what did he do this time?".
what did I do wrong this time...?
Everything I do is wrong.
Nothing is ever right.
Why...?
Am I that stupid...?
Am I that ignorant...?
Am I.. that much of a fool...?
Am I...?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Moving On (The World Isn't Fair)
Moving on
Something I wish not to do
Something I dare not to do
Simply because wishes don't come true
Simply because dreams don't come true
Who said this world was fair?
Moving on
Seeking something that can't be found
Seeking someone that's never around
Finding nothing in the world I roam
Finding nothing in this dark damp home
Who said this world was fair?
Moving on
Forever standing still in the sight of past
Forever wanting the lost old scenes to last
Yet all fade away into the dark despair
Yet all stare around me with none who'll care
No one said this world was fair.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
God....
I don't want to continue...
Not anymore....
I've endured everything to this very second because it is wrong to take my own life...
But my gut continues to sink in...
My emotions continue to flood...
My self-worth continues to plummet...
My wild desires continue to burn...
My imagination continues to grow like untamed weeds...
My dark thoughts continue to cloud my mind...
My flesh continues to wage war daily with my mind...
When will all this stop...
God... Make it stop...
Please, make everything stop...
No one else but me.
It hurts when the person whom you believe loves you most in this world (besides God) keeps using your guilt as a weapon against you to do something they want you to do.
And it hurts when it happens often.
Very often.
I feel the guilt enough without anyone telling me.
I know the guilt well enough without anyone pushing it.
But she has to rub it in.
A lot of times.
It hurts.
Whatever happens, whatever will happen and whatever that has happened before;
I'm to blame.
No matter whose fault it really is.
I'm to blame.
The first question that comes to her mind when something wrong happens
is "what did he do this time?".
what did I do wrong this time...?
Everything I do is wrong.
Nothing is ever right.
Why...?
Am I that stupid...?
Am I that ignorant...?
Am I.. that much of a fool...?
Am I...?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Moving On (The World Isn't Fair)
Moving on
Something I wish not to do
Something I dare not to do
Simply because wishes don't come true
Simply because dreams don't come true
Who said this world was fair?
Moving on
Seeking something that can't be found
Seeking someone that's never around
Finding nothing in the world I roam
Finding nothing in this dark damp home
Who said this world was fair?
Moving on
Forever standing still in the sight of past
Forever wanting the lost old scenes to last
Yet all fade away into the dark despair
Yet all stare around me with none who'll care
No one said this world was fair.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
God....
I don't want to continue...
Not anymore....
I've endured everything to this very second because it is wrong to take my own life...
But my gut continues to sink in...
My emotions continue to flood...
My self-worth continues to plummet...
My wild desires continue to burn...
My imagination continues to grow like untamed weeds...
My dark thoughts continue to cloud my mind...
My flesh continues to wage war daily with my mind...
When will all this stop...
God... Make it stop...
Please, make everything stop...
posted by Liil Masks at 12:46 pm
2 Comments:
Haizz..
I know how ya feel..
When someone uses your guilt just so you would do something they want.
Eric's done that to me PLENTY of times. x_x
And I still did it..'cause well, I liked him. :/
I do what I can for him. ><
I mean, no one's perfect in this world.
I can be a clutz sometimes. @.@;
And people "occasionally" forgive me for all that I've done wrong.
So don't blame yourself too much..
Mmmkays?
As long as you do what you can to make it right..it's not much of a bad thing. ._.
(That's from my point of view though.)
Wow. Exasperated comment after 2 years. Interesting, anon. Verrrry interesting.
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